My First Three Weeks as a CBM Intern...

I haven't been as active on Facebook for a while (the past three years, to be exact). Although it's okay to post a 1,300-word status, it's more proper to do that on a personal blog that I only update on occasion. So here's a quick rundown of what's been going on in the past three months… I mean, weeks.


I'm interning with Children's Bible Ministries (CBM) alongside four fantastic people from Camp Grace that I've known for a few years. The basic premise of this internship is: learn how to do everything. Since I just love lists, I'll compile almost everything that has happened into one big list for ya!


I've taken a few classes ranging between evangelism, apologetics, appearance, communication, phone etiquette, and social media for non-profits. Each of them taught me something I didn't know. Sometimes I wish I was a note taker so I could list them all. Currently, I'm reading an Old Testament survey book that is tons of fun to read and extremely insightful.


I've shared my testimony probably three dozen times. During our evangelism class, we did role playing evangelism where we would witness to another one of the interns who was acting like they were, say, an atheist, a victim, a liberal, an agnostic, etc. etc. And we had to share our testimony, and then mold it according the person we were talking to. Then they had us practice our testimony, tell it to groups of people and churches and all this other crazy stuff. A lot of people know about my life now. But the good thing is: I'm almost totally comfortable with telling it!


"Hello, my name is Paul Daly, and I am an intern with Children's Bible Ministries..." One of my harshest weaknesses is walking up to someone I've never met before and talking to them... about anything. Maybe that's a debilitating fear or a psychological wall or just an annoying facet of my personality, I don't know. But I've been doing plenty of talking to strangers lately—in person and over the phone. Soon, I'll be answering phone calls, which is much easier for me because they're coming to me. That's different... I guess.


I have laundry and other responsibilities that I usually don't have to keep track of. My parents did well to teach me how to do this stuff, but it's so very difficult to keep myself accountable for what needs to be done. For example, a hamper full of dirty clothes has been sitting in my living room for four days, ready to take to the laundry... and I'm just now doing it.

 

There's been a lot of firsts. First time calling the bank. First time leading worship at church. First time buying something with a debit card. First time I've bought my own groceries that I had to, ya know, eat as meals. These are just a few, but there have been many, and there will be many more. 

I've met a few people. I'm actually good at meeting new people, apparently. They just have to be pursuing me, and I'll be friends with them in a matter of hours. So I've gained a few extra Facebook friends, and established some pretty nifty connections. Yay for people. 

I've worried about money. I know I'm perfectly okay, and my finances are doing just fine. But the prospect of running out of money because I spend too much haunts me nowadays. What's worse: I am an impulsive buyer. In fact, the first thing I ever bought on this internship was a T-shirt from Mellow Mushroom that had a polygonal art-style deer with birds on its antlers holding strings of cheese from a floating slice of pizza. Anyway, I have a love-hate relationship with money. Soon, paychecks are going to be spread a bit farther apart and I may have to sacrifice some impulsive buying (even though it's so darn fun.) Fun fact: "free" has bumped up to my third favorite word, behind "discombobulated" and "defenestration." Of course, if you would like to assist me and my sanity, I do have a webpage where you can help me out with finances. The only money I'll use to buy stupid stuff is the money I work for from CBM. Most of the rest goes to food, savings, and other important stuff. …Man. Important stuff. That's freaky. 

Some opportunities are peeking out at me. CBM is a very ambitious ministry that desires to spread all across the country, and it's so easy to get caught up in their firestorm. I've had meetings and discussions and quiet times when God has really been pointing me toward some stuff and nudging me forward. The major thing is camp ministry. Even though I don't know where I'm going with my life, I know camp ministry is going to be a big part of it, as it is already. I haven't sold my soul to the idea, but it's an idea nonetheless—and it's the best one I have.  A second thing, which is more of an afterthought than anything, is the Northeastern USA. That subject is even more mysterious because I hadn't even thought about it for the past year or two. (There's a whole different story about how I started getting interested in the Northeast.) So that's weird, but God has sparked that interest and I'll just have to see where it goes. After revealing this to the other interns and staff, they are considering to send me up near that direction during my rotations… at least, those are the rumors I'm told. 

What is adulthood, and can I eat it? I still feel like a teenager. That's all I'm gonna say on this matter. 

WHERE ARE MY PEOPLE!? I haven't seen my parents in a few weeks. Which, I can do, but it's still odd. They have a cat now…… I wanted a cat before I left. Anyway, I haven't seen my girlfriend in a few weeks either. Which is also odd, but likewise doable (it sucks that I have to mail her one-year anniversary gift, though.) But I have a Father and a Friend that never leaves me, no matter what. And I know that He is with those precious people in my life, too. These few weeks would have been impossible without Him, and so I plan on holding on to Him for just a little while longer. 

That was an understatement. I'll be relying on Him for a very very long time. 

I feel like there's more to say. But I'm brain-shot. In summation, I'm having fun, I'm learning things, I'm doing hard stuff, and adulthood is going to take a while for me to acquire a taste for it. 

Either way, God is good and He's got it under control. He brought me here in the first place, and I am grateful for Him holding me through it. I know the decisions I make now will impact greatly how I live the rest of my life. And so I have decided to commit myself to His work and His will. Time to see where He takes me!

In Christ,

Paul

Boldness

I've had a very interesting summer. This being my third year serving as a counselor, I expected a lot of new things to come up and lot of new lessons to be learned. This year, God has been challenging me in an area I'm not too great in... boldness.

Boldness — not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring.

I hesitate. A lot. I have some serious fears, too. The last person I'd call bold is myself. However, God has called us to the ministry of being bold. Bold for Him, and bold to expand His Kingdom.

This summer, I've been reading through 1 Samuel for the very first time. Throughout 1 Samuel, there's a whole lot about a fellow named David, probably the most bold character of the Bible I've read. When he was young, he fought off lions and bears and a particular Philistine giant we all know named Goliath. While everyone was afraid, he stood firm. Every battle he came across, he fought it without hesitation. Every time Saul attempted to take his life, David pulled through simply on account that he was bold. He was even bold enough to spare Saul's life... twice! The life of David in the book of 1 Samuel has been a huge influence to how I want to live.

Another great thing God has shown me this summer is my spiritual gifts. All year, I've speculated what my primary gift is, but throughout the summer, God has solidified it to the point that I know now for sure. I have the spiritual gift of wisdom. This means that the Spirit has given me a supernatural ability to discern the thoughts and feelings of God toward a certain situation, person, or idea in order to make godly decisions concerning them. I can always figure out what pleases God, I can always plow through a complicated web of issues to determine the core problem, and I can always tell when something or some decision would end badly. However, people don't come flocking to me asking for advice. So a lot of times, I'll need to speak up when I'm not necessarily invited to. And what does that take?

Boldness.

Not to mention, God has led me to make a decision for this year. Instead of going to a community college and staying at home for my first year out of high school, He's led me to leave my home, my church, my awesome basement, and my girlfriend for a whole year on an internship with Children's Bible Ministries. And guess what it took me to finally come to grips with that decision.

Boldness. (And a little bit of steroids. But that's a different story entirely.)

God wants us to be bold. God wants us to stare danger and rebuff—whatever that is—in the eyes and move forward anyway. Sometimes what He's asking us to do will change our life. It may offend or sadden some people. It may very well cost us something. But God is so much better than any of that. God is worth it.

Boldness is all about confidence, power, and strength. If we're honest, that's something that not many people have. But it's not so much about what we have as much as it is about what God gives us. After all, we can't save ourselves... that's something God gave us through the Son. In the same way, we can't be bold without God giving us boldness. We can't be wise without God giving us wisdom. We can't be merciful or patient or loving or serving unless God gives that power to us.

So will I be diligent to rely on God to give me boldness? No. Not yet, at least. That's something He has only begun to work on me with. But this year is going to challenge that, with the internship and all. So we'll see just how long that lasts.

Now for the portion where I pull out Bible verses to prove my point...

1 Samuel 17:45 — Then David said to the Philistine, “You come to me with a sword, a spear, and a javelin, but I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have taunted.

Joshua 1:9 — Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Isaiah 41:10 — Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.

2 Timothy 1:7 — For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline.